Pastor Barry's  "Chapter & Verse"  Day 162

June 12;   James 1:19;   218/260(I);   ‘Quick to Hear’

James 1:19 So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;

In real life, this verse is almost always reversed.  Most of us are slow to hear and quick to speak.  Listening is incredibly important and has been called, ‘a gift someone gives to another.’  It cannot be overstated how vital it is for a person to be listened to.  So often, people are not listening, they are waiting for the other person to be quiet, so that they can talk.  How will you ever know what the person you are communicating with is saying, if you will not listen to them?  It is not just what we have to say that is important.  Lack of communication is one of the key reasons married couples divorce.  Here are some critical, biblical rules about communicating.  What you say should be said in love.  You have every right to speak the truth, but if you speak that truth in love it is very powerful.  The Bible says that a gentle answer breaks a bone.  When you are speaking do not go on and on without stopping.  After awhile, anyone would tune you out.  Speak for short intervals.  When important information needs to be conveyed, speak for a short amount of time and ask the person you are speaking to understands what you said.  Let them share what they believed you said and continue in this manner until you both are convinced that the desired message has been communicated.  Listen with your heart.  Try to understand not only what was said, but how it affected the person saying it.  If you do this, your response will much more likely be appropriate, because you will really know what was said.  Getting angry will be much less likely because not only words, but feelings will have been shared.